Ellé Bell Café

Earlier this week a friend of mine created a startling conversation twister on me. Here is the scenario: Your ex-husband of years and years ago comes to you and says,” I have come back to be with you, I am a changed person.” And he really may, he just may finally be absolutely everything you have ever dreamed. What do you do?

I said, “Oh my, heck no…what ugh! WHAT?!NO!!”

(But, come on, baby&...

As the melodic wind chimes dance on the swirling gentle breeze giving life to the delicately layered song that soothes my soul, my thoughts drift on that very breeze to a quiet place. I stand at the bottom of a towering mountain where I strain and squint to gaze all the way up to the top of its snow capped ridges. I hunger to see the world from way up high in that extraordinary place. I imagine it is illuminated in shimmered crystal lights. I long to dance barefoot in victory a...

As the ragged edges are trimmed off the day I find my therapy in a hot, soapy sink full of dishes. Over the past few hours my glass of white zinfandel disappears sip by sip while thoughts somersault through my mind, and eventually I drift back to where I once was in a time and place lost long ago. Childhood.

I was raised in a small village on a lake, and on a farm in the middle of nowhere on the weekends. Whether I...

The rolling gravel slips under my shoes and I slide, skinning my leg. The jagged edges of the stony path are sharp and I see blood as it trickles and oozes from the muddy, tender place and drips contrasted on my white skin. Steep and winding is this treacherous path. It was one my mother warned me not to take but I wasn't paying attention and honestly it didn't seem to matter. Before I knew it I was here and I couldn't turn back.

...

Never wish for the end of life to stop feeling sadness. Sometimes it is overwhelming, I know. We have all been there at some time. Some hurt their bodies to stop the pain inside. Some pain is from your decisions, sometimes your heart is at the mercy of someone else. Sometimes you hurt and you don't know why.

Almost always, pain you feel because of someone else is avoidable. First is your mindset. Never go into any friendship or relationship thinking ...

A great realization has manifested itself to me as of late. I realize things are not as they seem, nor do I want what I thought I did. I never thought I would have demands or expectations but I do. Essentially the confines of my narrow minded thinking has landed on its head, shattered and broken beyond repair. Life as I thought it was is over and a new life has emerged…

I used to want to live and grow old in a...

Today someone I cared about passed away.

The last words I said to her on Christmas Eve were "I love you". She knew it. She knew it by the way I talked to her, took the time for her, the way I stood up for her, listened to her and understood her. She knew it not just by my words, but by my actions. Point is, she knew it. Nothing else matters.

I truly and...

Wondering if there is a place where someone so out of place can belong. Thinking… there really is no place- no one- for me. Inside this uninhibitedly enthusiastic façade of happiness and splendor contains this conundrum, and a hollowed outsider I will stay. This is not an invitation for sympathy. Realize there is peace that exudes from love spilled out to comfort and heal the devastated, to shield and protect the exposed and breathe life into the dreams of others. As...